In the last couple weeks I have become increasingly depressed by choosing to think depressing thoughts. “I can't live without you. I hate being alone. I want you back.” I have been envisioning the worst; I am always going to feel like this - they say the third year is worse etc. etc. etc. Whoa; I found out in a hurry that process of thinking is making matters so much worse. I am learning real quickly the power of my expectations. Reality is not what's REAL, but what I am expecting. Author V. Jensen writes in God Never Quits “Expectations can be a way of locking into the present the worst that I can envision for the future."
"A calm mind is good for our physical health, but it also enables us to see things more realistically". Dalai Lama
It’s clear that I need to replace my "expectations" (which honestly feels like fear to me sometimes) with a new way of thinking. I am letting go of these painful thoughts and turning my thoughts to positive expectations. I am going to survive and be strong. I won’t be sad every day. I will be okay……Am I putting my mask on again; maybe! But with the grace of God - I will continue to MOVE and not get stuck on this journey called grief.
I know that God has a plan for me; I will continue to pray for clarity and understanding to know what I am supposed to do. I will keep hope and belief in my heart that a parent can learn to live life again albeit differently after the death of their child.
"A calm mind is good for our physical health, but it also enables us to see things more realistically". Dalai Lama
It’s clear that I need to replace my "expectations" (which honestly feels like fear to me sometimes) with a new way of thinking. I am letting go of these painful thoughts and turning my thoughts to positive expectations. I am going to survive and be strong. I won’t be sad every day. I will be okay……Am I putting my mask on again; maybe! But with the grace of God - I will continue to MOVE and not get stuck on this journey called grief.
I know that God has a plan for me; I will continue to pray for clarity and understanding to know what I am supposed to do. I will keep hope and belief in my heart that a parent can learn to live life again albeit differently after the death of their child.
For we are saved by hope: but hope that is seen is not hope. Who hopes for what they already have? But if we hope for what we do not yet have, we wait for it patiently.
Romans 8:24-25
Romans 8:24-25
No comments:
Post a Comment
Please let me know if I can help in anyway. I am here to listen and share this journey called grief with you.