Left Behind

Message from my best friend who also lost her older brother:
 "My best friend lost her oldest son 2 years and 4 months ago. In addition to his grieving parents, he left behind his younger brother.  I cannot begin to imagine the enormous loss that grieving parents suffer, but I have felt the enormous loss that a sibling suffers.  The remaining children witness their parents pain, see the emptiness in their eyes and don't want to burden them with how they are feeling, so many siblings grieve in silence." 

Jason's birthday was last week on October 31, 2012.  The picture you see below was sent to me by a friend of my youngest son as he sat with his Jay-Jay on his birthday.  This image speaks volumes of the hurt and heartache in my son's heart; of a brother left behind.  My son always acts so strong and so together around me.  I know he thinks I hurt enough without having to watch him grieve; he goes to incredible lengths to hide his pain from me.   As a parent I could fix just about anything whether it was a broken toy, a difficult homework problem or a wound. This is the  first time I can’t solve the problem and make it better for my son.  As a Mom it is so hard and breaks my heart; I can't fix this one.......

When a child has died, siblings are often referred to as “the forgotten mourners.” While parents usually receive most of the support of relatives and friends, siblings generally receive little—often being asked “How are your parents doing?”

When a sibling dies, all future special occasions will be forever changed. There will be no more shared birthday celebrations, anniversaries, or holidays. There will be no telephone calls telling of the birth of a new nephew or niece. The sharing of life’s unique and special events will never again take place. 

 When your parents die, it is said you lose your past; when your spouse dies, you lose your present; and when your child dies, you lose your future. However, when your sibling dies, you lose a part of your past, your present, and your future.

REFLECTION - Psalm 9:9

The Lord is a shelter for the oppressed, a refuge in times of trouble.