The Lord Sent An Army

I have walked around the last couple days replaying the experience that transpired on Sunday in Church.  A small voice in my head told me I should share with you what happened.  Trauma of losing my son Jay has left such a large hole in my heart; it is a monumental task to be in a place of grace and joy at times.

There are two passages in the bible that I hang onto with every fiber of my being.  I read them over and over; they give me hope that someday I will be alive again and not just existing on this journey called grief.

·         Jeremiah 31:13 “I will turn mourning into gladness….I will give them comfort and joy instead of sorrow.” 

·         Jeremiah 29:11 “I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord – plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”

 Sunday when Pastor called those to the altar; I thought to myself I am not going up again.  I have gone to the altar so many times not only here but in South Carolina and Florida.  Always with the same burden: desperate for comfort and healing….desperate to know God’s plan for me.   I have to believe that Jay’s death will not be in vain – that some good will come from it.

 As I stood in the back of the church; I prayed with all my heart that the Lord would send me an ARMY to heal the brokenness in my heart.  

My sister asked me to go with her to the altar; she didn’t want to go alone.  I went with the intent of just being present for her.  As I stood behind her the need for my own prayer was overwhelming so I stepped over to pray.   I felt the Pastor’s presence behind me also praying.  I thought why me!  Then he looked at me and said I am not trying to embarrass you, but feel we need to do this.  The next statement he made were the most profound words.  He said “I want all men to come and pray for her."  In all my years of attending Church I never heard Pastor ask for just the men to come and pray.

Pastor had called an ARMY of men………..my dear Lord heard me.  I have Hope!